Waind Boys: Still learning

Well, all 3 boys are still NICU patients. This has been a very hard week for Ben and I mentally and emotionally. I don't think we ever thought all of them would be in the NICU for a month (this Saturday) especially after the great start that Evan and Riley had. They are both still doing great and gaining weight like crazy (makes me sad how fast they are growing, but of course it is what we want). The only thing keeping E and R there is that they aren't taking all of their feedings by bottle, they tire out at times and have to finish by the feeding tube. As soon as they look like they can handle the entire feeding the Dr goes and ups their feeding amounts! Haha, I guess we will get there someday. E and R also got circumcised yesterday, Dad was by their side but I chose to stay and keep Payton company; there are just some things Mom doesn't need to see ;) We made sure to give them extra cuddles afterward!

Payton is slowly coming around, but still has a lot of catching up to do. The way the Drs are talking now it is more realistic that he may be sent home on oxygen and a monitor :( The lung hemorrhage he had on Day 2 really did a number on him I guess and it is just taking him a while to recover. He doesn't eat as well either; PT/OT says that he has learned to protect his airway at all costs so he blocks the bottle with his tongue and fights any milk in his mouth. We learned a few tricks yesterday and actually got him to take half of his feed without any drops in his stats, we hope that the nurse had some luck over night as well, we will see. Payton also has reflux that has been making him pretty uncomfortable and unstable at times after feedings, poor bug! We move him into bed with his brothers when can, but he always gets put back in his single inclined bed by one nurse or another.

Ben and I had a "talk" (read: cry) with our Dr and Charge RN yesterday to explain some of our concerns of late and we are hoping that some things improve so we can get through the frustrating slump we have been experiencing this week. I have cried more in the last few days than I ever have I think, the good thing is that the slew of people in and out of room understand and don't look at me like I'm crazy (they already did that when they found out we have trips!) It's hard to explain, I could probably write a book, but what we really want is to be home, as a family...finally. We have been the one constant in the trips daily life and the RNs change constantly, this has become very tiring for us (by yesterday we had have 5 new day RNs in 4 days! Yes, one day shift was split by 2 different (new) RNs, that was fun). It's like we have to start over (sometimes everyday, 2-3 times a day) every time we have a new nurse taking care of them. They do not know our routine and how involved (and competent) we are, we have to listen to their opinions, stories, remarks, etc and also coach them on the boys. It's not that the nurses aren't taking great care of them, it's that they all have a different style and practice and don't offer the consistency that the boys need right now. We feel that this inconsistency may be what is slowing down their progress, it is disappointing when a RN sets you up to tube feed Evan because she thinks he will be tired (before he is even assessed) just because he nippled his last 2 bottles. No, that is what he is suppose to do! This then turns into a frustrating experience (which in this example we were right, Evan drank the entire 3rd feeding in row, no tube needed!) and leaves us questioning the progress that is made while we are not there. This is one small example of many, I have luckily vented enough the last day or so (Thank you Ben, Mom, Katie and Angela!!) that I don't have to do it all in writing here!! :) Don't get me wrong, our boys are getting great care and we LOVE their Drs and primary Nurses, we are just more than ready to be our family and not have to share our space with a nurse. (Keep in mind, most parents of singletons see their nurse 2/3 of the time less than we do as the nurses each have 3 babies to care for. Since our boys make up 1 nurse's assignment they don't have anywhere else to go....so they are with us ALL.THE.TIME!!! Can a lady pump in peace, please!?? Unless of course we have a nurse that knows us and our boys, then they respect that we know the "routine" and they let us be to take care of the boys- those days we leave the hospital as very happy parents!!)

We appreciate all the prayers for Payton and the rest of our family, we are feelin the LOVE!! We are hoping to put this bag of emotions behind us now and move forward with positive attitudes and concentrate on helping these boys learn and move on! We are SO ready to be physically exhausted (at home) as we think that will be more manageable than this emotional exhaustion, ha!